A story at dinner or on a first date
Short stories for good company
Social stories are short, and they're half of a conversation. The ones that work last about a minute, have one vivid detail, and leave room for the other person to tell theirs.
The shape
About a minute, one sensory detail, then hand it back
- Start in the middle. Skip the background. "So I'm on a ferry with forty schoolkids" beats ten seconds of context.
- One sensory detail. What it looked, sounded or smelled like. One is enough to put them there.
- The turn. The moment it went wrong, or got funny, or got strange.
- Land it. A line on what you made of it. A wry line works better than a moral.
- Hand it back. Ask something that invites their version: "Have you ever had a first day like that?"
How it can sound
My first week in a new job, I walked into what I thought was the lift and it was the cleaners' cupboard. I stood there in the dark next to a mop for a good ten seconds, because two people from my new team had watched me go in and I couldn't face coming out. When I did, one of them just said, "Going down?" We've been friends ever since. Have you ever had a first day like that?
The one detail to find
The detail that gets the laugh or the wince is usually physical: the mop, the smell, the sound.
Leave out
The long version, anything that needs a lot of background, and your biggest personal story on a first date. Go a little deeper each time you meet.
Build it
- Emotional Arc Mapper: Map where the story rises and turns, and check it has at least one sensory detail.
Go deeper
- Module 5: Show, Don't Tell: Why Sensory Detail Works: Show, don't tell, and why it works
- Module 6: Reciprocal Vulnerability: The Ping-Pong Pattern: Taking turns: how sharing builds closeness